False beliefs

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I like most people. I like most children (I know they are technically people). I like most dogs. I find it slightly amusing when someone assumes I help dogs because I’m heartless, selfish and weird. I find it slightly upsetting when someone assumes I don’t help children instead because I’m a people-hater. The final argument condemning me as a worthless, useless human being is usually that I have no children of my own. Out of choice.

Funnily enough, people who spend their time and money supporting a charitable cause are too busy to criticise anyone supporting another charitable cause-no matter how different from their chosen one.

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I’m more than slightly amused when people seeing my dogs assume I can’t afford a ‘proper’ one. For some, dogs have always been a status symbol. There are breeds that are fashionable for a season and breeds that due to stereotypes or preconceived and oversimplified image people have of them are often bought to project a certain image. In a way the dog we own reflects our personality. Even if it only shows we got the fashionable breed because we want to impress others.

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The dogs I have can tell you a lot about me, but very little about my social position or financial circumstances. They can tell you I like a challenge, I am happy to make a fool of myself in public, that I’m hyperactive and easy to please, that I don’t have overly ambitious expectations and that I’m a keen learner. That I’m skeptical, inquisitive and I hold a grudge. And that perhaps I’m selfish and weird, though not in a way people who don’t know me would think I am.

My false beliefs get in the way, too. I often assume other people reason in the same way as me. Though I don’t assume they love my dogs only because I do.

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25 thoughts on “False beliefs

  1. Interesting perspectives.
    Our beloved Ray clearly has no pedigree, and we openly admit that he was from our local Humane Society. He could not be considered a “fashion accessory” by any stretch of the imagination, but he is a cause for many conversations all of which (to date) have been very positive. Some people do not understand my commitment to him, and how we have changed our lifestyle because of him but then….. 4 years ago, I would have not understood it either. Perhaps we should just accept that non-dog owners cannot be expected to understand our decisions?
    I don’t understand people who live in huge houses and are no happier than those in more conservative homes.
    I don’t understand people who buy exotic sports cars.
    I don’t understand people who sky-dive!
    There are so many things about people that I cannot relate to, and it seems most appropriate to expect them to be no different.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. well, it’s about my false beliefs’ as much as anyone else’s- I do know people don’t think in the same way as me, but I always find it slightly amusing when I encounter a specimen that I simply don’t get at all…and it does make me laugh when people indicate I have rescues because I wouldn’t spend £500 for a pedigree…and I like the faces of those who ask about all the ‘bring Lily over’ operation when I answer how much it had cost us. The inevitable comment: ‘oh, you could get five proper dogs for that’ just makes me want to go back to my dogs!

      Liked by 2 people

  2. I don’t know why anyone would think that you help dogs because you’re heartless, selfish and weird. That’s odd to me. I have come to realize that God gave each of us a heart for a different charity, or cause, so that they all get the attention that they need. Keep doing what you are doing. You are great with these dogs!

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  3. Lol! What’s a proper dog? They all need the same love, care and attention, which you provide wonderfully for your dogs. We see a lot of “status” dogs here which I just find very sad..how you choose to spend your time and money is just that-your choice. As for children…I couldn’t possibly manage a whole one…!!

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    1. it always makes me laugh when I hear ‘a proper dog’ my dogs are the properest (for me) and I always sense a problem in someone’s own life if they decide to comment on mine. I didn’t want to put it so bluntly in the post, but the most important message about me that my dogs send is that I don’t give a shit what pretentious snobs think about me 🙂 (sorry but it sounds weak with any other word)

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I often wonder how it is that people have so much time to tell others what to do, and feel qualified to pass judgement on things that are, essentially, none of their business and about which really they don’t know much. When there is, honestly, so much to be done in the world. A family member once told me that “everyone knows you’re a deviant! you don’t have kids!”, so I feel you, kiddo. My sense has always been that there are so many, (with differing numbers of legs, and maybe hands or paws or wings or fins, and skin types and fur or feathers or corrugated skin or shells, and personalities, numberless) who are on this earth and need someone to care for and about them, there’s no need to replicate oneself or go out and buy some poor creature who’s been, on some level, mass produced for consumption. Every animal who’s ever shared my life has been “rescued”. Of course we all know who really rescues whom….I’d just say, keep up your WONDERFUL attitude and work and approach. You are doing the right thing.

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    1. There are a number of reasons for this. A primary one is an individual’s dissatisfaction with their own life. If they are feeling particularly negative about themselves, then you (figuratively speaking) bother them by being happy about your life. To make themselves happier (relative to you) they must try and bring you down. i.e. on a happiness scale, they want to bring you down to below them…. and then their life seems much better! It’s all relative!
      There is also the “misery needs company” concept. An individual perhaps cannot have a dog for some reason and so the fact that you do have one and, are clearly enjoying its company, is a reason to try and bring you down. It makes them feel better.
      So many people have children which were either not exactly planned, or have really interfered with their desired life style… and then they meet somebody who is free to do whatever they wish because they have no ties! Again, their intuitive reaction could well be to prove how much you are missing out on. This serves to make their circumstances appear a little better.
      My approach to all those individuals is to politely listen and then disengage. I see nothing to be gained by being rude, and clearly listening to nonsense is not making good use of my time! (I could be playing with Ray!) 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Absolutely well said! It really IS better to do the important thing- play with the dog- and so much easier. I never condone rudeness altho confess I do have a lot of smart remarks in my head at times. The dog fortunately reminds me how silly that is.

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  5. My Remy is a purebred Anatolian Shepherd because he was (is?) my new service dog and I had to know the qualities of the dog who was replacing my last S.D. (also an Anatolian). Our “spare dog,” Henry is probably a Boxer/Pit mix and had been dumped on the side of a freeway. Remy is invaluable because he’s sweet, funny, smart, because of the tasks he does for me. Henry is invaluable because he’s sweet, funny, smart, and he’s ours! I don’t think it matters what pedigree a dog has attached to him/her. Dogs are fantastic and I’d never want to live a day without dogs!

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    1. That’s very true! A brilliant comment summarising what I think, too 🙂 I have absolutely no problem with any breed or genuine breeders, on the contrary, I hope one day everyone will get their dog from a regulated, dog-loving breeder, who cares about the dogs’ well-being and makes sure the puppies go to the right homes. I love Great Danes more than any other breed and most people do have a particular breed that suits them more than any other. I just don’t think any breed is better than any other, it’s just like asking which tool is better: a screwdriver or a hammer…And I have an issue with getting a dog because it’s fashionable.

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  6. I totally know what you are talking about! I’m a vegan and when (some) people hear that they accuse me for not helping the starving children in Africa/sick people/lonely old people/whatever people. From what I’ve learned it’s the people who do good in one field are way more likely do good in other fields, as well. I buy Fair Trade products whenever possible, I give money to other charities as well and donate old clothes, CDs and such to a charity. At least on one of these accusation cases I know for sure that the person attacking me doesn’t do anything (to any charity) herself.
    I also have a rescue dog, (with extremely bad separation anxiety, which we got help for from a specialist) and I seriously think that if it tells anything about me, it’s that I am amazing, big hearted awesome person. And I think the same of you, and any other person who adopts instead of buying. Rescue dogs rock!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Funnily enough, many people also have the misconception that vegans are trying to ‘convert’ meat-eaters. I have been a vegetarian all my life, vegan most of it, never tried to make anyone else do anything about their diet or life philosophy, but I have been preached to (about how sick I will be, about how little it matters and so on) more times I can recall. I really think it’s the ones who have problems with accepting themselves and who don’t really like their own lives, that find some consolation in criticising others…good luck with your rescue, hugs from all of us! xxx

      Liked by 2 people

  7. This is a great post, and it speaks as much to people’s implicit associations as it does to their outward prejudices. I am a rat owner and for some reason beyond me, the rats I rescue have incredibly expensive problems vets don’t usually see in any animals, letalone rats. They keep me broke which actually annoys and angers the people in my life. I’m not sure why they care so much that I help them and get so much joy that it’s worth it. People assume a lot about me as a late 30s, child-free spinster with a mischief of rats! I openly admit to preferring to help animals over people though. People charities have a lot of advocacy, I’d rather lend myself to the oft forgotten. I love what you do, and what you observe 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I like rats, they are easy to teach and in many ways the best pets you can think of. People who are unwilling to go beyond their tiny little boxes of assumptions and superstitions miss out on life-but they only have themselves to blame. Good luck with your ratties, I’m sure they are lovely and I definitely think taking care of them means you’re a good person. They feel and can suffer-that should be the only thing that matters.

      Liked by 1 person

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